Thursday, September 01, 2005

REASONS TO BE CHEERFUL*, SPRING!

The first day of September is the start of spring here in beautiful Johannesburg and does this city have the perfect climate or what? We’ve gone from summer to winter with barely a brrr and it’s spring again, all those blossoms foaming around the razor wire, jasmine so pungent it stings the throat, even the birds have become giddily infected with the madness, chirping their heads off from trees bursting with pink.

The start of spring usually represents that lovely slow slide towards Christmas when the holiday season takes hold and everything gets put off until "next year". You wait for the first tinsel and fake snow spray and the sound of that first irritating Christmas commercial. Then you realize with a horrible shock that most of the year is over and you still haven’t done that thing you promised to do. It’s a good time to go through last year’s New Year’s resolutions because you’ve still got 4 months to do them, I’m pulling mine out and, uh, about that yoga, those cartons of cigarettes, ah well, four out of ten is better than last year, and there’s still time.

Reasons to be cheerful

1. That my shoes aren’t on a bridge in Baghdad.
2. That my house isn’t flooded with toxic bilge, a lifetime’s mementoes, photographs, carefully assembled collections, swamped in an instant of madness, compelling me to spend days and days with 10 000 other people in a huge oven with no food, water or toilets.
3. That my most pressing concern right now is what to have for dinner.
4. That I have a dinner.
5. That tomorrow is casual day at work and all the guys in the office have promised to wear short shorts.

* Ian Dury

Reasons to be Cheerful Part 3 (abbrev)

"Summer, Buddy Holly, the working folly
Good golly Miss Molly and boats
Hammersmith Palais, the Bolshoi Ballet
Jump back in the alley and nanny goats

18-wheeler Scammels, Domenecker camels
All other mammals plus equal votes
Seeing Piccadilly, Fanny Smith and Willy
Being rather silly, and porridge oats

A bit of grin and bear it, a bit of come and share it
You're welcome, we can spare it - yellow socks
Too short to be haughty, too nutty to be naughty
Going on 40 - no electric shocks

The juice of the carrot, the smile of the parrot
A little drop of claret - anything that rocks
Elvis and Scotty, days when I ain't spotty,
Sitting on the potty - curing smallpox

Reasons to be cheerful part 3
Reasons to be cheerful part 3
Reasons to be cheerful part 3
Reasons to be cheerful part 3

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Reasons to be cheerful part 3

Health service glasses
Gigolos and brasses
round or skinny bottoms

Take your mum to paris
lighting up the chalice
wee willy harris

Bantu Stephen Biko, listening to Rico
Harpo, Groucho, Chico

Cheddar cheese and pickle, the Vincent motorsickle
Slap and tickle
Woody Allen, Dali, Dimitri and Pasquale
balabalabala and Volare

Something nice to study, phoning up a buddy
Being in my nuddy
Saying hokey-dokey, singalonga Smokey
Coming out of chokey

John Coltrane's soprano, Adi Celentano
Bonar Colleano

Reasons to be cheerful part 3
Reasons to be cheerful part 3
Reasons to be cheerful part 3
Reasons to be cheerful part 3

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Yes yes
dear dear
perhaps next year
or maybe even never

in which case

Reasons to be cheerful part 3"

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